A Fork In The Road

August 8, 2019

It’s been quiet around her for the last several months. I took a hiatus to really dig my heels in and work on my book, but then I hit a snag. Something inside of me just wasn’t feeling it. I can’t tell you what, but something just wasn’t right. I hit a fork in the road. I realized that I wasn’t through with my healing.

Now I realize you are never truly done healing from a trauma, but there were some areas that I was still struggling with and still dealing with some bitterness. I was too spread thin between single motherhood, moving forward in a long term relationship, working full time, and then trying to write to really continue processing and to be sure that it was time.

My book has been on hold for a few months now. I’ve had to really sit back and pray more about the direction God wants me to go with it. I really began to struggle with doubt and confusion about if this was even God’s plan for me, and I really let myself fall into doubt with my writing.

But maybe that’s okay.
Maybe that was part of God’s plan all along.
Maybe it’s normal if it takes time for you to be whole again.
Maybe, just maybe, there is grace in the healing.

And still, I come back to this phrase written to a dear friend:

What a beautiful piece of grace to make it far enough in life to hit a fork in the road.

And while it was written to someone else, maybe I was actually writing it to myself. Lean into grace and healing and tears and peace. He is faithful to complete that which He started in you. 

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